I have a pet peeve. So much parenting advice assumes that parents are at 100%: they aren’t overly stressed about their job, they have lots of energy, they’re getting enough sleep, they’re not sick themselves or overwhelmed by a child’s needs. Because that’s the amount of energy it takes to apply a lot of that advice. Of course, that just makes parents feel bad.
How do you parent when you are sick or exhausted? What kind of parenting advice actually works at those times? For the last two and half months, I’ve had the opportunity to find out.
“I know the day will come when he won’t talk to me anymore.” Parents say this to me in my pediatric office all the time. There is an idea that one day teenagers, particularly boys, won’t want to talk with their parents anymore. But that is simply not true.
Parents can create a family culture of communication so that kids will keep wanting to talk with them as they get older. And that’s not only great news, it’s essential. Because when things get tough for our kids, it’s important that they know they can come to us.
More than anything, parents want to do their best for their kids. But every parent I know lives in the pressures of the ShouldStorm, which bombards them with shoulds. Always telling them what they should and should not be doing to maximize their child’s development.
Now, new research from the University of Chicago has shed light on a sinister way the ShouldStorm actually drives parents to undermine their child’s development, all while thinking they are helping. It all comes down to what parents are told is good for kids.
Mom rage is something moms don’t talk about. The ShouldStorm tells us we should be patient all the time. But moms feel anger and it’s normal.
As parents, our stress has been through the roof with back to school coming up. We are all wondering how we are going to make this work? But sometimes that stress shows up as anger, and that can make moms feel terrible guilt. It’s time to talk openly about it.
Research shows that kids are active agents in how they handle the coronavirus pandemic, and they want to share their ideas with parents.
It’s not long until the kids go back to school… or don’t. Or go back to a blended schedule with some virtual learning. And if you are like me, you are a parent who is holding your breath to see how this is going to work. Because the coronavirus pandemic has definitely made education challenging. But did you ever think of asking the kids to help you figure it out?
Being a parent is wonderful, but parenting can be stressful. That stress leads us to “do our research” and hit google. And the internet gives us unending amounts of parenting advice. That’s when it gets confusing. Who should you listen to? What do you do when the advice conflicts?
I’ve never appreciated my kids’ iPads as much as I have during the time they’ve been at home for COVID-19. Prior to this my feelings on their screen time have been very mixed. On the one hand, I know they have fun and it’s cute to hear them gaming online with friends. On the other, I worry about what it’s doing to their development.
The first time I spoke an editor at Psychology Today, and she offered me the chance to blog for them. I was really excited to start writing about what’s going on with parenting these days. How could we parent effectively with all the anxiety in our culture?
But then she said something that surprised me. “This is going to be great,” she said. “We need a pediatrician to be telling parents it’s going to be okay so they can stop worrying so much.”